Supervillain NFL Mock Draft 2017

With the 2017 NFL Draft just a few days away, this mock draft projects the first ten picks if the draft class were made up of supervillains.

  1. Lex Luthor (Cleveland Browns)

The Browns need a young fearless leader at quarterback next season, and that man is Lex Luthor. His genius level intellect, his robotic super suit, and most importantly, his intense anger towards Superman will turn him into one of the best quarterbacks of his generation.

  1. The Riddler (San Francisco 49ers)

With the second overall pick, the 49ers select the Riddler. While the riddler has an incredible level of intelligence, his physical weakness does not make him an ideal nfl player. Still, the king of questions is perfect for the San Francisco 49ers due to their questionable roster choices. Riddle me this: How many wins did the 49ers get last year? Answer: 2

  1. Voldemort (Chicago Bears)

With the third overall pick, the Chicago Bears select Voldemort. The Harry Potter villain is a great fit for the Bears, especially because his face looks more Bear than human. His magical ability and passion for death make him a good pick for the bears. In a city where the weather is always cold and gloomy, Voldemort should feel right at home. The bears also need a quarterback, and Voldemort has proven his skills by leading the infamous Death-eaters and by taming a poisonous snake.

  1. Mr. Burns (Jacksonville Jaguars)

With the fourth overall pick, the Jacksonville Jaguars select Montee Burns. The Jaguars will find a strong replacement for Blake Bortles, the king of garbage time, in Mr. Burns from The Simpsons. Burns’ intellect, draconian tactics, and arsenal of hounds makes him a strong addition at quarterback.

  1. Swiper (Tennessee Titans)

With the fifth overall pick, the Titans select Swiper from Dora The Explorer. Swiper is the king of stealing, and that makes him a great choice to play cornerback opposite Logan Ryan. With Swiper on the field, as long as he isn’t covering Dora the Explorer, his wide receiver will not touch the ball.

  1. The Joker (New York Jets)

With the sixth pick, the New York Jets select the Joker. The clown prince of crime will find a home in the Jets, as his green hair and white-painted face should match the Jets’ hideous uniforms. His affinity for jokes will also fit in with the Jets, as through the butt fumble and last season, the Jets are a joke of a team.

  1. Darth Vader (Los Angeles Chargers)

With the seventh pick, the Los Angeles Chargers select Darth Vader. Notorious for choking in big games, Darth Vader is perfect for the chargers. He can make plays in the secondary by using the force, but he can also his his combat skills and force choke to make plays at the line of scrimmage.

  1. King Kong (Carolina Panthers)

With the eighth pick, the Carolina Panthers select King Kong. The brutish ape will be a great addition for the panthers defense. He will fit right in at nose tackle, as his experience swatting planes and attacking people will make him great at batting down passes and stopping the run.

  1. Ultron (Cincinnati Bengals)

With the ninth pick, the Bengals select Ultron. The Bengals need a leader at Middle Linebacker, and Ultron is well equipped for the role. His superior intelligence makes him great at making quick decisions. His ability to fly makes him elite in coverage and his strong metal body makes it difficult to get past him.

  1. Godzilla (Buffalo Bills)

With the tenth pick, the Bills select Godzilla. The Bills need a star wide receiver to complete their offense, and that receiver is godzilla. His short arms limit his pass catching ability. However, his monstrous size makes him an easy target for Tyrod Taylor to hit. His fire breath also improves his draft stock, as he can literally burn defenders.

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